Marriage is arguably the greatest life commitment that people commit to. From dating to courtship and finally marriage, the process is characterized by adventure and self-discovery. People tend to focus more on the activities and the merry making such that they forget the reality of marriage is a journey that needs preparation.
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Many people ask “Is premarital counselling a per-requisite to a happy ever after life?” The answer to this question may not be as black and white as you would like it to be. However, through pre-marital counselling you should get a clearer picture of how important it can be to you and your significant other.
Focus on the Marriage Triangle
Successful marriages are usually based on a marriage triangle comprising these crucial factors; couple traits, individual traits, and relationship and personal contexts. Individual traits affect your approach to the institution of marriage. Examples of these traits are interpersonal skills, self-esteem and your belief concerning marriage. Counselling helps in manage expectations by opening up individual traits for discussion in order to address concerns now that may arise and cause problems in the future.
Couple traits refer to conflict-resolution skills, communication, and values and goals statements. Through a marriage counselor, the couple are helped and shown ways in which they can build upon their areas of strengths and how to mitigate their weaknesses.
Lastly, personal and relationship context refers to how you have understood what you think marriage is based on your past. Pre-marital counseling provides a third party view as well as guidance and methods on handling past issues before you cross over into marriage.
SWOT Analysis Benefit of Counseling
The recipe to a successful marriage lies in the maintenance of your own identity while at the same time integrating as a couple. For most people this is not an easy process and may end up causing serious issues. Cultivating the degree of individualization within marriage requires counseling. In this way you will be able to increase your individual awareness while connecting to your spouse to accommodate the marriage institution and all it entails.
Commitment to Marriage Success
The pillar that counselling helps to build within the marriage is commitment. Success in marriage can only be realized if the two of you are committed to working it out. You get an opportunity to plan your future together. It also gives you excellent opportunities to strengthen your problem-resolution strategies. You will also benefit in learning how to create back-up plans when crises develop in married life. All these skill building techniques will enhance your success in marriage and lessen if not eliminate most of the stress factors.
Enrichment of Marriage Life
Pre-marital counselling provides you with guidance on enriching your marital and relationship lives. It is a fact that many of our families and the contexts we grow up in do not avail sufficient opportunities to learn about marriage and how to relate as a married couple. Simple things such as learning each other’s love languages to the more complex aspects of how to nurture one another and grow together are learned activities that are discussed at pre-marital counselling. The end result is a mutually beneficial relationship where each party is committed and satisfied.
Exploration of Issues of Family Origin
The bliss that come with a relationship and courtship makes people blind to the fact that they need to explore their family roots. These are the things that later on could bring hiccups in your marriage. Premarital counseling ensures that you find out as much as you can about family origin and any issues that may arise out of that. This helps the two of you to know and understand each other better.
Finances are always a touchy subject area that premarital counseling seeks to address. Through the specialized lessons and counseling assignments, the husband and wife to be are taken through a comprehensive course that addresses their financial concerns and helps in clearing the air and stabilizes their union.
This discussion only touches surface on the benefits of pre-marital counselling. If you want to learn more about the other benefits and varieties of counselling that are offered, browse through the other categories on the site.
Barbados Jefferson is a marriage counselor who has honed his counselling skills through article and site research such as Professional Counselling & Coaching Services. He wrote here some tips that are beneficial for those who want to get married soon.