Dealing with midlife crisis, how to cope and help others
In order to deal with issues like midlife crisis, it is imperative that you understand what it entails. It is fairly common to experience feelings of self-doubt and uncertainty due to a certain change in your life. This life-changing event may be your 18 year old leaving home for good, a divorce or even a death following which you feel the need to redefine yourself. Circumstances that are beyond your control sometimes change your roles in life (as a parent, sibling or spouse) and you find yourself searching for a place to fit in the puzzle, which is life.
The symptoms of midlife crisis include feeling the need to show-off achievements you have made in life, mood swings, blaming others and enjoying the company of a younger crowd. Another sign of someone going through this predicament is the purchase of expensive things like a sports car or branded bags. Signs of depression are also common symptoms of midlife crisis. So if you wish to help yourself or someone you know, it is important to first establish what they are going through – look for symptoms of midlife crisis before jumping to any conclusions!
Once confirmed that you are indeed suffering from midlife crisis, you can start by trying to regain control of your life. Whatever problems you might be facing at that point in time must be due to some external force that you have absolutely no control over. This can be a cause of great stress. At this point, map out your life; create changes in your mind. Give yourself some time, search online and read blogs that tell you how to look at life with a positive outlook. If you are helping others cope with this crisis, encourage them to avoid stress. Look at the negatives in your life as learning experiences, count all the positives and move on. Take perspective and see where you were and where you want to be in life now.
There are certain areas of life that fall under your control such as relationships, diet, work, finances etc. Learn about eating healthy and start following a routine, go for a walk, create a reasonable budget and so on – take over your life in all the ways possible.
Don’t look down upon a crisis as something that will leave you weak, look up to it as an opportunity to make positive changes in your life. Sometimes you need a little shake up to get back on the path that you are supposed to be following. Such a crisis has great potential to make you a better person so don’t spend your energy and money on wasteful things like a tummy tuck or a big car or that expensive eye liner that is supposed to make you look perfect; you are perfect just the way you are and you need to accept that fact.
If you know someone who is going through a crisis, take their concerns regarding the crisis seriously. Listen to what they have to say and be sincere to them. Let them get their point across, then give them your own perspective on things. Sometimes all it takes is another person’s view about things; someone to help them understand their problems.
They might appear completely preoccupied but still encourage them to stay busy engaged in healthy activities. They can go for a walk, do chores and even write a journal or a blog. These activities distract them from their blues and cheer them up. Pottery or yoga classes can be a good option as well. Encourage them to go out with friends and family and have a good time. If it is your significant other suffering from midlife crisis, do not hover over them all the time. You can assure them of your presence and loyalty but you also need to give them space, time to think and explore.
Take extra care of yourself no matter what you are going through. Do things that you love to do; watch a movie or a show, read a book, exercise, anything. Even though you may be greatly tempted, yet do not isolate yourself from others. Since this is a time to gain perspective, it will be a good idea to call up a sincere friend and ask for help through this disaster. Isolating yourself from the world will definitely not help solve your problems; in fact it might just leave you more depressed.